We Have to Tell Them, and Show Them.
Before I could share some tools with him, he had taught me something.
This week, I am sending you a double dose of goodness. Here ⬆️ you can hear the story I promised to share last week. If you have some seeds of projects that are waiting around, you may enjoy it.
Now for this week’s story:
My friend is upset.
She was just told by a prospective client that they had decided to hire a professional instead of her.
My friend IS a professional. She has the education, the experience – and the talent to prove it. Which is why she is upset.
I ask: “Do they know how good you are AND that you're a professional?” She shrugs.
Suddenly, I remember.
The very early years of my life coaching career, a time when I still offered “free discovery sessions.” Really, this meant “Give me 20 minutes to prove to you that I can be helpful.” Now, if I ever do a free discovery session it is in order for me to decide if I want to work with someone, if they are ready or if they are going to waste both of our time.
A few minutes into the session, me doing my best to prove to the man across from me that I could indeed help him declutter his messy life, he paused and asked: “What tells me that your advicd is going to be better than the advice of the next guy sitting on a bar stool at the bar down the street?”
I didn’t know if I should be offended, laugh – or respond.
I don’t remember what I said. I think I froze.
Apparently, I did answer something that made sense to him because he and I worked together for years after this first meeting.
Before I could share some tools with him, he had taught me something.
With his brusk and somewhat unpleasantly brutal manner (one of the first things we worked on together), he had jolted me into realizing how important it was to not assume people knew how great we are. How gifted, talented, proficient or even professional. We had to tell them, and show them. And do it again.
And then the “buts” come in:
But I shouldn’t have to.
But I am an artist, not a marketer.
But I told them.
But I don’t have time.
But I don’t know how.
But it makes me uncomfortable.
Fine. BUT they won’t guess. And then when it comes time to pick someone, they will likely pick someone who took the time to do all these things.
Told them, showed them. And dit it again.
It’s not fun, maybe be it’s not fair (whatever that means), but there we have it.
If we want someone to give us their time, their attention, maybe their money, we have to tell them and show them, why it is a good idea.
In the end, like most good things, it doesn’t have to be very hard. But it does ask that we make the shift away from: “they should know.”
Because often, “they” don’t.
And you’re too awesome to not fix that.
***
An invitation:
“Back to Me” is a powerful course that will give you a ton of insight into who you are and why you live your life the way you do, along with a simple way to make some deep and lasting change.
🟡 If you are at a place in your life where knowing yourself intimately — in a way that you likely haven’t yet — is important, whether you already “Speak Essence” or not, I warmly and excitedly invite you to join me.
🟡 If you are at a crossroads and know you need to get really close to YOU before making some big decisions, if you yearn for Clarity, I warmly and excitedly invite you to join me.
🟡 If your life includes guiding others through big choices, I also warmly and lovingly invite you to join me.
(The class will be recorded in case you cant be there live – And if you take the class and feel that you haven’t gotten something powerful out of it, I will send you your money back. Because I really want you to be there)
